Someday I’d like to see a minor motion picture. Definitely want to read the book first, though.

This just in: Scientists have finally succeeded in isolating the Jerk Gene. Unfortunately, a cure for this ubiquitous condition has yet to be discovered. In a recent interview, genetics expert Dr. Diane Sektion confirmed that the condition is not gender specific.

Gaskets help stop leaky hoses, right? So, since it’s allergy season how about a nose gasket?

For years I’ve thought I was the Cleverest because I made a sentence out of March Fourth — March forth. But it seems I’ve been outdone:

May the fourth be with you.

HAHAHAHA

The poppies were so grateful I didn’t put them outside that they bloomed for me. If you can’t read the thermometer, it’s below 40. Just so you know.